thewayne: (Celeste)
[personal profile] thewayne
Last week my wife was chatting on the phone with her sister in Maine. Celeste was getting insistant about wanting to go outside, and this presented a conundrum: we've taken to walking Celeste rather than letting her roam free. She's been eating things that (a) we don't know about and (b) could be rather dangerous for her, so she's been on a leash for the last few weeks. This is also good for Russet and I as we take a couple of walks a day. But Russet wanted to spend some more time talking with her sister as she's going to be going to Maine and Virginia in a few weeks, so she let Celeste out to run about as she used to do.

A little while later, Russet sees Celeste trotting up the street to the house, but something looks weird. Initially Russet thinks Celeste's tongue is massively swollen. Some neighbors who see Celeste react with disgust. Russet then revises her opinion and thinks that what the poodle has a large liver in her mouth.

When the poodle finally gets to the house and Russet's able to pry the hunk of disgustingness from her mouth, she realizes it's a heart. Or, more precisely, half a heart. Fortunately it had been cut in half, not chewed.

We think someone butchered an elk and just dumped the leftovers in the woods somewhere (isn't that just offal?). For the next couple of days, Celeste was kind of insistant that she wanted to go off the road and into the woods at a certain point, but we were firm on the leash and she didn't get to investigate. She's since lost that urge.

The heart was bagged and thrown away, much to Celeste's chagrin.

Now, the funny part is that the next night we went and saw Pirates of the Caribean II: Dead Man's Chest. I shall leave it to the reader to complete the joke. Fortunately we live almost 900 miles from the sea.

Date: 2006-08-08 05:32 pm (UTC)
ext_8850: (button)
From: [identity profile] gritkitty.livejournal.com
(isn't that just offal?)

Har har har!!

Enjoy Maine. I was just there. Soooo cool; so very cooooool. Now I'm in VA and sweltering. Bleah.

Date: 2006-08-08 05:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] felisdemens.livejournal.com
When I lived on the reservation, the dogs were forever bringing back horrible relics from the poachers that plagued our land. Whole spinal columns with one flopping leg attached, stinking to high heaven. Eurrrgh.

I always sort of hoped that one day the spinal column would belong to one of the poachers.

Date: 2006-08-08 06:02 pm (UTC)
ext_41947: (Default)
From: [identity profile] keleos.livejournal.com
(isn't that just offal?)

Not nearly as bad as that pun. Bad Wayne.

Date: 2006-08-08 06:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thewayne.livejournal.com
It'll just be Russ in Maine. I'll still be up in the mountains, except for the holiday weekend when I'll be down in Phoenix.

Date: 2006-08-08 06:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thewayne.livejournal.com
Incorrigable punster: do not incorrige. ;-)

Date: 2006-08-08 06:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] vaudy.livejournal.com
Oh, it gets worse and worse! :D

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