(no subject)

[thewayne]

My friend, Magic Rat, did not make it. He passed away some time Friday AM, apparently without regaining consciousness. I doubt he suffered: based on the description that the game store owner gave me, even though he seemed responsive after the initial event, it was a pretty massive stroke.

His name was Jason, he was born in Hawaii and grew up in El Paso where he attended college. His family moved to Phoenix and we worked together at Flying Buffalo in the early 80's. Aside from a friend from high school whom I've known for just about 30 years, Jason was among a group of friends that I've known the longest. I didn't get to game with him much lately, but frequently when I was in town we'd get together for a movie. When I was in Phoenix two weeks ago we saw 300 in a digital projection theatre then shot the breeze for the better part of an hour in the parking lot and at an In-And-Out Burger place.

Jason would have been 50 in August.


He came over to my condo quite often to watch movies. I had a very nice set-up: Marantz DVD and Laserdisc and receiver, 26" TV, Bose and B&W speakers. In fact, now that I think about it, in a used bookstore he spotted the laserdiscs that I bought of Millionaire's Express (Sammo Hung flic) and another Chinese Kung Fu movie whose name escapes me for the moment but starred Michelle Yeoh and was about the "founder" of Aikido, she played the main character. The tofu fight is absolutely amazing. Great movies.

We slew a lot of dragons together. Over the years we played Champions, Espionage, Top Secret, Pulp Heroes; Mercenaries, Spies and Private Eyes; Deadlands, probably D&D, Star Wars, DC Heroes (the original exponential system), Marvel Superheroes, Villains & Vigilantes, Tunnels & Trolls, Amber the Diceless RPG, 7th Sea, Spycraft, and probably a lot more role-playing systems that I can't remember plus uncountable board games. We were pretty evenly matched when it came to backgammon. We also spent a ridiculous amount of time online playing Diablo II, initially over 33.6k and later 56k dialup. He ran games that I played in, I ran games that he played in, others ran games that we both played in. In at least two campaigns our characters had relationships beyond that of the superhero team, in one case (Jason's Ghostdancer, a girl who didn’t know who she was prior to her death and my Holly, a female warrior/demon hunter from another dimension) we shared a house, in another (Jason's Wizard of Speed and Time/vampire hunter and my Asian female martial arts assassin sent to kill the heroes) were romantically involved.

Jason gave me some good suggestions for some of the games that I've designed. And, like with most of my friends, I spent lots of hours working on his and his parent's computers, usually getting a meal out of it and on more than one occasion some green stuff, and it wasn't wasabi. His mother is an excellent cook, we always looked forward to what Jason would bring to pot luck parties.

When we were at Flying Buffalo, it was not uncommon after a Saturday night game to see the eastern sky brightening.

One of my favorite gaming moments of all time was with Jason. In the original DC Heroes RPG, what I thought was perhaps the coolest thing was that you could have Batman and Superman on the same mission and both could be effective without dominating the mission. The difference in power level between the two is huge, there was no comparison in that area. But Superman could fight the Superman-level villains that no one else could touch while Batman mops the floor with thugs. Well, Jason was running Supes and I was running Bats. A bad guy threw a Kryptonite grenade at us which would have decimated Superman: I did a dive for cover on top of the grenade and saved his bacon. I will always remember that moment.

We also shared taste in comedy. Both of us were huge Python fans back when Python was fairly new, we also liked Firesign Mystery Theatre.


He's the first Ex-Buffalo (that I know of) from that era to have died, which is a little surprising. Jim has been undergoing treatment for cancer for about two years (or more) now, Ben has had a pacemaker implanted and has had some pretty severe illnesses, and Terry had his heart swell so much that they didn't think he would make it out of the hospital. Terry was a Vietnam vet who was partially disabled due to losing part of one leg and Agent Orange exposure. He's living up in Las Vegas.


The funny thing is that I called my parents to let them know, and so that they'd know that I'll probably be in town next week for the funeral. It turns out that they'll be here in Las Cruces tomorrow and won't be in Phoenix next week! (three of my Dad's five sisters are in 'Cruces) My dad looked at his up-coming work schedule (he's scheduled tighter now more than before he retired!) and they decided that this would be a good week to come up here.


*Sigh* It's going to be a long weekend, especially since my boss isn't sure that I can be spared right now to be gone for three days. I won't be very happy if I can't attend the funeral; but if I can't, I can't. Another funny thing is that when I started working for the City of Phoenix, I got sick in my second week and had to take Leave Without Pay (LWOP). If I have to take three days off from here, that’s $500 out of my pocket. No big deal, I’m used to not making much, so if my first paycheck is somewhat diminished I’ll survive.


Thank you all for your prayers and good vibes. It's a mercy for everyone that everything was over so quickly.

Comments

[deborak]

I like to think that Jason is up there in that big gameroom in the sky, breaking out the counters, having a smoke, and waiting for the rest of us to show up.

[thewayne.livejournal.com]

Thanks, G. I appreciate it. What can you say.

[thewayne.livejournal.com]

Well, he said that if he ever found out that he had a terminal disease that he'd take up smoking again. He's now beyond that, so I don't know whether or not he'd be smoking up there.

And would the counters be black SS counters? ;-)

[joecthulhu.livejournal.com]

Don't forget clipping the counter corners with a fingernail clipper.

[deborak]

Really? I never noticed him doing that, LOL.

[thewayne.livejournal.com]

Oh, yeah! He was quite fanatical about his board games, I think he didn't like the little paper debris that it left on the map. He always had fingernail clippers with him.

Definitely a good memory to keep.

[rockybanzai.livejournal.com]

This is an old wargamers technique. The counters both looked better if properly trimmed and they were easier to manipulate around the board too. And yes, it's very anal which naturally means I did it too.

[apostate-96.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry to hear about your friend dying. At least it was quick and sounds like it was about as painless as you might be able to hope for.

I hope it works out for you to be there for the funeral.

*hugs*

[thewayne.livejournal.com]

Thanks, I appreciate it. I've done a lot of crying, and I'm sure I'll do some more. At least I'm home for the weekend with my wife.

[deborak]

I know this hit you very hard. Take care of yourself.

[thewayne.livejournal.com]

I am. It's been quite a while since I had someone close die, that probably contributed to it. It'll be good to spend the weekend up here in the trees, I'll probably do a little hiking Sunday.

[apostate-96.livejournal.com]

You're welcome. It really does hurt losing someone close to you like that. The obvious depth of your grief says a great deal about just what kind of person he was.

I'm glad you're home and around some support. It can make doing some of the crying you need to easier.

[ateji.livejournal.com]

It sounds like he's a wonderful friend. I'm sorry you lost him.

[thewayne.livejournal.com]

I'm definitely going to miss him. Thanks, A, I appreciate it.

[fastlearner.livejournal.com]

I'm nearly speechless. SO unexpected, so very fast.

I'm so glad he was gaming with his friends at his favorite game store when he lost consciousness. Couldn't have asked for a better ending.

[thewayne.livejournal.com]

That's about how I felt, simply speechless. For Jason, it's probably about as ideal an end as he could have had. I'm sure you'll be told when arrangements are made.

[thewayne.livejournal.com]

I'm glad we talked at the Game Depot on the 21st. Though I am confused at your mentioning The Morrow Project... ;-)

[fastlearner.livejournal.com]

I'm glad we did, too, brief as it was.

condolences

[paulmc.livejournal.com]

Very sad about the loss of your and deborak's friend.

Re: condolences

[thewayne.livejournal.com]

Thank you, Paul.

[donkey-hokey.livejournal.com]

:(

I hope you'll be able to attend the funeral.

I'm glad you had the chance to catch up with him a couple of weeks ago.

[thewayne.livejournal.com]

Thanks. I was very glad to get to spend time with him then.

[spaceoperadiva.livejournal.com]

Condolences on the loss of your friend.

[thewayne.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I love your icon, I definitely could have used it this week! I got some first class cuddling with my wife, that helped loads.

Just in case you hadn't heard

[joecthulhu.livejournal.com]

Jason's family has decided not to have a funeral or memrial service. The Game Depot is planning on something the evening of the 21st, and family members may attend. I'd wait a few days and call the store once they've worked out the details.

Re: Just in case you hadn't heard

[thewayne.livejournal.com]

This afternoon I got an email email from Liz that was forwarded from Felicia that came from Dave & Patty (sounds like biblical begats!) that announced it. I am fairly certain that I'll be there. And if things work out, one way or another, we'll have something else there....

[laughs evilly]

Re: Just in case you hadn't heard

[gnarlock.livejournal.com]

Apologies if this double posts, trying to get my account activated and working.

The night I heard Jason has suffered a massive brain hemorhage, I think I was shocked into not being shocked... and of course I felt bad that I wasn't feeling worse. Friday Kris called me fairly late in the morning and was quite shaken up. She really didn't need to say anything since I knew what the message was with the first sob, but, she managed to tell me what had happened. I called my superviser and talked to him about what had happened and then I broke down while talking to him. I did like his response when I mentioned that I felt bad about not being more upset the night before. He basically said that it wasn't 'real' yet... now there is no escaping the reality of Jason being gone. I'd been grieving in my own way earlier that day too. Mentally I was talking to Jason telling him, selfishly, that I had more to tell him and that he was to hang on and getting a bit angry at him for having a DNR. That said, I understood why he had a DNR and largely agree with it (though, not wishing to be brought back if less than 100% is a bit much imho).

All that said, I was there at the memorial at the Game Depot and it was a fine time indeed. More of a wake than a funeral, and thus much more of something I prefer by way of a rememberance than most. A little background information: my father is a mortician and funeral director and despite that I can not stand funerals. Grace Sato (I've always known her as 'mom Sato') had a wonderful statement she had read and there were few, if any, dry eyes in the house. If you press me, I'll admit that I didn't cry, but, that doesn't mean I wasn't on the verge.

At the risk of repeating myself, the evening was grand with lots of folks I've not seen in years, and several missed for not being there, as we all celebrated the evening playing games in homage to a dear lost friend: Jason. As these things go, the hilight of the evening was meeting old friends once again. From a game perspective, the hilight of the evening was playing Acquire with Jason the declared winner. Scott was second place, only to Jason, and seemed quite proud to have nearly won Acquire. At games end he said "this is the closest I've ever come to winning acquire" and if it's not an exact quite it is close enough for everyone to understand the tone.

We had to go too soon that evening, but, too soon was still around midnight and after others had declared they were leaving. Leaving the next day was bittersweet as I would've liked to have stayed, but, life was calling and it's call is strong. Worse, I know that Jason would've understood answering that call and would've felt no less bittersweet than I for having answered it at this time.

Re: Just in case you hadn't heard

[thewayne.livejournal.com]

It was really good seeing you and Kris there, even though the circumstances were less than ideal. Russet and I spent three hours with Grace looking at the three photo albums that she had of him. It was a lot of fun and surprisingly not really that sad talking about him while going through the books. I did feel kind of uncomfortable, though, when she asked me to go through his room and take what I wanted. There were some specific things that I wanted, and it wasn't easy resisting the temptation to take a bunch more, but I only took things (with one exception) that had specific memories of Jason for me. For example, I took Tortoise & Hare: he taught me how to play and I won the first game. I haven't won since, but I've fairly consistently placed well.

Are you on any of the Yahoo groups that we have that are mainly for Ex-Buffalo RPGers? Jim's been posting about the disposition of Jason's game collection.

[rockybanzai.livejournal.com]

Hi Wayne, I'll look forward to seeing you in Phoenix later this week. I'm just sorry it has to be under such sad circumstances. We're coping, I guess, but things are still a little on the sad side. Lately, I seem to be stuck replaying large swatches of the last 25 years over and over in my head. Jimmy posted a list on the Ex Buffalo board of things Jason reminded him of and that helps a bit. Chuck

[thewayne.livejournal.com]

Things will improve, but then occasionally something will leap out at you and surprise you. Today I was looking through boxes in storage for a book or two and I came across a pin that I bought in San Diego at Bazaar Del Mundo for specific use in Jason's Deadlands game. Definitely a wistful moment.

You might want to look at my profile, I think all of the ex-Buffaloes who blog here are represented. Scott's blog here is mainly the same purpose as yours, he mostly writes on his Xanga blog.